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I’m building a tribe. I want you to join.

posted by Eivind on January 6, 2011, at 10:00 am

(this blog post is a duplicate, with minor edits, of a newsletter I just sent out. Subscribe to the newsletter on the sidebar).

Hi Guys,

Time to gather around the fire

2011 is upon us. I hope you took the chance to set your intention for the year - either on New Year's eve or January 4 as I suggested. It makes a big difference. I also hope your celebration was great, though it could hardly have topped mine ;-)

Seriously, I think I had the best New Year's celebration of my life this time around, spending two days with old and new friends untangling our egos, dismantling our stories, dancing till we dropped, being nekkid in a sauna together, laughing our heads off, going deep together, eating well, being rude (in a good way) - really liberating to be so open with others.

This is an important blog post and I don't want to take too long getting to the point, but I gotta share this one moment that had me laughing so hard I cried. Certainly, it's one of those "you had to be there moments", but I'm gonna share it anyway.

The running joke among me and the guys I went with become "No more holding back. From now on, we're gonna f*ck everything open!" This is guy lingo for penetrating obstacles and fears and always open to truth.

We took this a bit...ahem, far...and found oblong, oval cushions - these things were big - and well... put them between our legs - and "f*cked the room open" (launching our truth into the room ;-P).

Thankfully, we shared the moment with some amazing women, and as we sat there laughing our heads off, the women went down on their knees and prostrated to our big cushion c*cks. God, I thought I was gonna die.

Humm, why exactly am I telling you this? *blush* Probably because it's time to stop holding back!!! And it was such an epic mix of parody and authentic male potency I had to share it with you. Universal rule: You really need to be zany once in a while to reclaim yourself. "Insanity" is the best antidote to conformity.

Anyway, I can't remember the last time I had this much fun and it ended with me and my two friends pledging Brotherhood before we split up. Damn, I love these dudes.

So, onto this issue of building a tribe...

Yes, I want to step it up in 2011. I want to build global brotherhood! There is a Whisper on the Wind already. As I listen, I feel called to act. There aren't that many places for men to meet online. Aside from whatever arenas exist within the Pickup community (which I have virtually no connection with), I personally only know of the inner circle provided by the Authentic Man Program (kick ass, but costs money) and the community over at Art of Manliness.

The latter seems, after cursory investigation, to have a slightly more macho vibe than I feel called to participate in. I want to provide community for the "new man", the dude who has integrated his Feminine and has gone beyond "manning up". This man is ready to take it to the 3rd stage - the Black Knight of the stories. His path is not up. More often, it's in and it's down.

That is where true male power blossoms, where gentle strength, Brotherhood, and absolute and total commitment to Truth and Love, even when the personal cost is significant, is the name of the game.

The world is f*cked right now (in a bad way) and we need to do something about it! The good news? Conditions have never been better to change the world and as the collapse of civilization draws nearer, so does the hope for complete and utter revolution of our species. I look to Authentic World. Decker Cunov, Bryan Bayer and the rest of those guys and gals inspire me. And they are way too few. Cause you know what - politicians and CEO hotshots are not gonna get this one handled. We will! I think of that saying "we are the ones we have been waiting for" and know it to be true.

So I want to set up a community on Masculinity Movies, where we can take the next step. A place where we can gather around the fire and tap into those ancient cosmic threads of knowledge, power, love and wisdom that we need so desperately now to make it through to the next phase of our co-created human story. On our own, we are powerful. Together we are unstoppable. No more holding back!

I'm about to invest in a Ning platform to set up that community. I envision men's groups across the globe meeting to watch powerful movies and going deep together - and that is just the beginning (I already have interested people in Holland, UK and Australia).

As the work and financial effort needed to make this happen falls on me, I would LOVE if you gave your feedback on this idea below. I'm stretched financially and this is gonna set me back several hundred dollars. Not a lot, I guess, but right now, significant enough. It helps to know you are on board with all of this and that I'm not talking to myself here.

And if you are as excited as I am about this idea, spread this blog post by using the social media buttons below and contribute to the rapid growth of a tribe I desperately want to have an impact on the world in 2011. It will be just one of many. The alliances that are about to form around the world to confront the challenges that face us makes me buzz with excitement.

I will write you soon and tell you more about the development of the technical platform, so that you know when you can jump in and take it for a spin.

Thanks for your attention and I leave you with a challenge: Stop holding back! Become who you truly are. NOW

Again - your feedback please.

In Brotherhood,
Eivind

  • http://malexperience.com Graham Phoenix

    Eivind

    A great idea. We should get together and become strong as a tribe. I would like to suggest a larger co-operation. How about a number of sites getting together to sponsor and run the Ning group. It’s a lot of work and it needs men to make it happen. I would be very happy to talk to you about ‘Male eXperience’ joining up with you for this. Maybe there are some others who would like to join in as well. Let me know what you think.

    Graham

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  • http://www.clarkechols.com Clark

    Elvind!

    I LOVE the story – I laughed out loud! A sacred moment, indeed. In fact I had one in my men’s group last night as I acclaimed that “I can fill the space!” that is my life’s unaccomplished mission! So I am in! when I next have a choice, I will contribute money to this effort!

  • http://www.pellebilling.com Pelle Billing

    Great idea, Eivind. It seems like a natural extension of your work.

    Why not check out some of the free alternatives for setting up a community? I searched for “create online community free” and there seems to be a number of options.

    I believe that this kind of community needs a solid foundation, and it should not be built on you having to spread yourself too thin financially.

  • James Barrow

    Hi Eivind

    “There aren’t that many places for men to meet online.”

    You are dead right, especially for men who are “ready to take it to the 3rd stage”.

    Personally speaking, in terms of online activity I’ve been spending (too) much of my time on (Wilberian) Integral sites. Good for the brain and cognitive development perhaps, but eventually it all feels too heady. Just the other day I rearranged my bookmarks/favourites page and put yours and Pelle’s at the top. So this announcement is very timely for me. I expect myself to be a regular reader and commentator.

    Go for it Eivind! You would be serving many of us out here who are craving for this kind of network. I think you are the man to do it.

    All The Best

    James

  • http://www.aaronfrater.co.nz Aaron

    From wellington New Zealand – I have a couple of freinds here who keep togeterh as an loose men’s group. I have been linked in with as much free content as I can with AMP & Ken Wilbers Integral Instutue. Partly it is becuiase I don’t ear a lot of money, part of it is our NZ dollar doesn’t translate too well into US dollars to pay for the forums you mentioned on the AMP site. Although, I must say the contact I have had from AMP has been great! They are cool people.

    Your site has lead me to the King, Warrior, Magician, Lover book, & more discoveries down that path. It helped me link into a men’s group in NZ – it is way up the other end of the country – but at least I can get there for a reasonable price & a day’s travel. The Essetailly Men course is the 1st time I ahve been to a Mens Group trianing & I found it wonderful! I would like to share these experences, & hear from the otehr guys who link with you, & what they have done, are doing, etc.

    I have found your site really usefull & inspirational – so – in 2011 I am keen to take it to the next level.

    Aaron.

  • http://www.masculinity-movies.com/articles/an-introduction-to-gnosticism Eivind F S

    Interesting idea, Graham. I’ll write you.

    Eivind

  • Alex H.

    Awesome post and agree.

    However, what do you like about AMP. I have looked into their stuff and what I got from the whole thing was a vibe heavy on supplicating women and putting them too much on a pedestal rather then the [i]Fire in the Belly[/i] “What am I doing and who’s coming with me” life. I also sense way to much feminine energy from them.

  • http://www.aaronfrater.co.nz Aaron

    Fair comment. I found their take to be supportive of the feminine, but more so of men & men relating to women, relating to life. I took it as David Dieda puts it – that the world is the BIG woman, & one’s own woman is a concentrated dose. I guess the AMP guys seem bit touchy feely , I got the most value from their free down load – the 10 sticking points of the inner game. They just did a re-cap of it with Ken Wilbur that is on their blog now too. I guess at the point I was at in my life a year or so ago – it was really useful, & I have been keen ever since. I like the focus on getting clear as to who I am as a man, & using my relationship with women as a testing ground. I have struggled to be a man in the world of work, I have avoided having children, but have some what come to terms with work, money, others kids in my 40s – but – relationships with women are still the most testing for me – so I use AMP, & even more so Dieda (I am re-reading the way of the superior man at the moment) as ways of helping me make sense of my self as a man who grew up un-initiated & has had to work at it myself. I also really need theoretical frame works, it is something my logical self craves to make sense of the raw experience I find so overwhelming. The other big inspiration was the King, Magician, Lover, Warrior book – which I borrowed, & have had to give back – so I read it – copied some stuff from it & keep it as a special part of the journey. I have a book called Manhood by Steve Bidulph which is really useful too – he is Australian, & their culture is almost identical to the culture here in New Zealand – so is especially relevant.

    As you can see – I do tend to rant a bit. I guess thats why I like wordy teachers – it fits my habitual models of reality. One of my 2011 commitments is to finally (after 30 years of thinking about it) take up a martial art – I am in ned of body grounding, & warrior energy where I am in my life.

    Thanks!

    Aaron.

  • http://www.masculinity-movies.com Eivind

    Hey Alex,

    Glad to have you on board with my idea! Your question about AMP is more easily answered if you invert it. “What do I not like about AMP?” Not much. Their customer support is a bit slow and disorganized sometimes. I like the rest (so much so that I noticed I took it a bit personally that you don’t like them :-) ).

    Each to their own I suppose, but I don’t resonate with your experience of AMP. It’s not at all about supplicating to women – it’s about getting closer with them – penetrating them if necessary – in service of both you and her. In their holarchy, the first three foundations are Presence, Appreciation and Integrity. What is different about AMP is Appreciation. This is probably where you’re picking up the feminine vibe, because that’s the Lover archetype.

    Appreciation is left out of most systems of masculine development, which would rather focus on Presence and Integrity and skip this Appreciation nonsense. But without Appreciation, we will remain forever in epic struggle with the world – for it never turns out as we want it to exactly.

    Appreciation is about learning to communicate how the world and the people in it impact us, to actually dare to be impacted. The alternative is to manage our truth, to build internal pressure and get fucking angry. Without Appreciation, there will be huge struggle and ego. For many men, that is fun – makes them feel alive (I know that from experience). But increasingly, I find myself not trusting men (or women) who are unwilling to express how they were impacted and who then resort to name-calling, managing others, or rationalization mindfucks.

    If that’s your cup of tea, then maybe AMP isn’t for you. But *I* actually like to feel my heart, to feel connected to the people of the world, to share the human experience.

    Thanks for the input

    Eivind

  • http://www.masculinity-movies.com Eivind

    Clark – great, fill that space! I’m glad you liked the story – I wasn’t sure about sharing it. And thank you for your generous offer. It has made me start thinking about things differently.

    Pelle – Possibly, but my experience is that the “free” solutions end up being very expensive due to all the customization and bugfixing I need to do on software which isn’t supported. I have considered BuddyPress and the idea seemed overwhelming for me. I’m willing to look at software like Ning exactly to prevent hours and hours of work.

    James – Yeah, Integral makes my head spin too, though I do love it. I prefer now to feel more heart in it. There’s something about your comment “I think you are the man to do it” that makes me feel disconnected from you. Less close. I just wanted to call that out.

    Aaron – Awesome, glad to have you with us.

  • http://www.aaronfrater.co.nz Aaron

    Yes – the AMP holarchy – all I have delved into is the free report – the 10 sticking points, the first 9 are split up into those 3  chunks (Presence, Appreciation and Integrity). Being the kind of man I am its the Presence I have to work on. — well, all 3 – but I like the way they chunk it down in this way – it makes sense after having made my start in this work by reading Deida.

  • James Barrow

    Hi Eivind
    “There’s something about your comment “I think you are the man to do it” that makes me feel disconnected from you. Less close. I just wanted to call that out.”
    That’s disappointing. It was meant as a statement of support and encouragement. But I like your honesty in sharing how it felt.  Happy to  share more email thoughts on this if you want.

  • http://www.masculinity-movies.com Eivind F S

    Hey James,

    I can understand how that is disappointing. And you have no idea how important sitting with your words has been for me today. I brought it up with my Brothers literally just a couple of hours ago and we plunged the depths of my resistance.  Boy, I’ve been on one heck of a journey today because of that.

    What we discovered is that I’m fighting becoming a leader something fierce. That I don’t trust myself to lead – that I just want to be one of the regular guys. Though they wouldn’t accept it. They kept saying with total conviction “you’re a leader, Eivind – go lead your tribe”. Shit, it was confronting. And soul nourishment to get that sort of acknowledgement from such amazing guys. They made me believe in myself tonight.
    So I’m going to accept that responsibility. Thanks for opening up that process, James – it’s been real important.

    Be well,
    Eivind

  • Jan Olav

    Hi Eivind,

    I think this is a great idea. One friday afternoon this summer, I was driving home after work and thinking about how it could be  possible to engage more boys and men in this kind of work, and in the men’s movement. What struck me then was that almost all boys and men are using a lot of time in front of their computer (unfortunately too much time with gaming). So via Internet, it could be possible to reach a large part of the men on this planet. Wow! Such an opportunity has never been available before.  And there are already good examples of what can be possible to achieve,- namely the Linux community and Wikipedia.  Therefore, an idea  similar to your’s was born:  ”The Global Brotherhood Initiative”. But I never came any longer than to the thinking, because the task seemed too overwhelming.  You already have an established site, a beginning network of interested and resourceful people, and a lot of enthusiasm and energy, so why not give it a try?

    What I discovered in 2010, was that when you take an initiative to something valuable and  brave, helpful people seems to “pop up” from the side  to support and contribute. I don’t think that is just plain luck.

    There are many good men (and women) around the globe which already have contributed with a lot of valuable stuff. And several more are likely in the coming.  When motivated men are working together towards a common goal, even mountains can be moved.  As Victor Hugo once said: “There is nothing as powerful as an idea whose time has come”. Maybe now is the time. I will be glad to join the tribe.

  • http://www.masculinity-movies.com Eivind

    Great, Jan Olav. I think we have something good going here.

    And I don’t think it’s just luck that people pop up either.

    Feels good to have you on board.

  • http://www.venwoude.org Leon

    Hi Eivind,

    Great idea! And -just as Graham- I like to talk with you about sponsoring and supporting this initiative. As you know, on a local (Dutch) level, I’m really into creating and maintaining dynamic communities, especially for men. This is so essential I think for our further growth as men. For Venwoude, I have some experience now with setting up and maintaining a Ning community site. Really looking forward building it together!

    Leon

  • Gerardo

    Greetings from Guadalajara, Mexico!

    Great Idea!!

    I want to join!!!

  • http://www.masculinity-movies.com Eivind

    Awesome, Gerardo – I sent you an e-mail :)

  • Alex C

    Extremely interesting! I’ve been warming my friends up to the idea of a loose-knit tribe and it’s creating new experiences for us – I’m excited to hear what you have in mind.

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  • http://www.masculinity-movies.com Eivind

    Awesome, Alex.

    ALL: I would like to point out the new button to the right end of the main menu. Click it and join the testing phase of the new technology. I want to get the tribe going. I’m eager to connect with all of you.

    The Tribe

  • http://NorbertOrlewicz.com Norbert Orlewicz

    Just stumbled onto your website Eivind, and really connected with your words in this story. All of these issues around male development and “initiation” have been lingering in my mind and my world for some time, but I haven’t had the time, nor the connections, to really delve into this part of my personal development. I have been looking to connect with and work towards the types of “goals” around true male development, empowering men, while serving the feminine, and fixing the “shit hole” that we as men, have created (and yes I do believe we as men are mostly responsible for the mess of our current state of affairs), and I absolutely agree that “we are the ones we have been looking for.”

    Eivind I will read more of your work here, and look forward to connecting with you. I am very interested in working with a group of men to connect other groups of men in a unified way towards empowerment and ultimately freedom and the well being of our global community. I believe, as men, we are stewards, and it is our duty to stand up as so many heroes have in the past, and do what is true and right. I am inspired by your words here and very interested to see where your vision could go.