I’ve watched a fair share of porn in my life. I’ve even been a member of a couple of porn sites in the past. But as I’ve matured, I’ve come to realize that men’s relationship with porn is fraught with problems and pitfalls. I have nothing against porn. I still watch it from time to time, although none of that weird shit that is popping up more and more out there.
The main problem with porn is that I’ve found that it, for the most part, hurts my sex life. The problem is that it externalizes sex. It becomes this thing “out there”. An impersonal thing which you observe from a safe distance. There is no love there, no connection. There is just wham, bam, thank you m’am. And the goal is always ejaculation.
I’m training myself these days to become a multi-orgasmic man and in this period, I’ve consumed porn only once. That one time severely damaged my consciousness, however, and much progress vanished in one fell swoop. A man who is overstimulated by what he sees and who sees ejaculation as the goal, will be sexually limited. So I have committed to not watching any more porn as long as I’m so vulnerable to its damage.
I include a link to a good documentary about the porn industry and how much men and society are hurting through overconsumption of it. It’s in English, though, so you can watch it too. It uses Silverlight technology, so you may be better off with using Internet Explorer.
http://www.nrk.no/nett-tv/klipp/601137/
It’s worth watching.
1.
bj0rnborg
Posted on February 13th, 2010 at 8:59 pm
Extremly interesting. Whenever I hear fellow men talk about concsiousness I associate this with spirituality and inheritance of the new age discourse. Are you into these kinds of ideas? If so, full respect to you man, so am I, though only just beginning.
As for porn, I will read that link.
2.
Eivind
Posted on February 14th, 2010 at 9:42 pm
I’m not so into the new age per se, Roger, but I’m big time into spirituality. I’m slightly wary of the entire new age movement because it seems to promise quick fixes and easy ways out, but it has contributed many good things.
When I said consciousness above, I would’ve been more precise if I said “attitude” or “motivation” this time around.
The link is worth watching for sure!
E
3.
Enric Carbó
Posted on February 17th, 2010 at 12:34 pm
The problem with porn is that goes to the mind, and sex is a matter of the body and (if there is love, which is most desirable) the heart. To have sexual intercourse with images in your mind is not the best way to relate with the other, and definetly doesn’t help to become multi-orgasmic man! For that you need to be connected with your body and heart(and your partner’s), that needs a sort of discipline, because our culture is mind-oriented.
I am going to see that link.
Saludos
4.
Eivind
Posted on February 20th, 2010 at 12:36 am
What you write parallels my experience exactly, Enric. Sex is about the body and the heart and porn takes you into the mind. It’s a state of disconnect.
Sometimes that disconnect of entering the mind seems to (for me) deaden the sensation of the sex, making it easier to control the intense excitement. But that’s no satisfying place to remain for very long. Awesome sex is about being incredibly excited and turned on and still being able to circulate the energy in the body.
As you say, it requires a sort of discipline. A lot of discipline.