Happy New Year, men!

posted by Eivind on January 2, 2012, at 8:32 am

Recipients of my newsletter, please respond in the comments below:

Some snippets of what I wrote you:

It's been a while since I wrote you! That's why it feels good to sit here in the dark of a early January morning typing out these words.

I spent the New Year in the woods with a group of 12 people, facilitating what was to many the best New Year of ther lives. There is a hunger in Norway growing for authentic interpersonal connections, dropping the social masks and just being real with one another.

I think that's the real challenge for men as well in 2012. So many of us are still stuck in roles. It often takes some form of "I can't show how vulnerable I really feel inside on the outside, because then I won't be a man and everyone will reject me and think I'm a loser and then I'll be lonely".

But it's those exact thoughts that make men lonely and weak.

In that way, 50s male stereotypes still live on in modern men. But I see signs that a tidal wave of change is coming. I look forward to us men becoming truly powerful in 2012 by dropping our masks and stepping into our true, authentic power.

......

One of the most important things in 2012 will be that more men of consciousness enter into the public's awareness. I expect that men's issues and authentic masculinity will be larger themes than ever before.

I challenge you all to start manifesting those wonderful visions and dreams you carry deep inside of you in the coming year. The world will need them.

  • Jon

    Thanks for sitting in the dark Eivind and compiling this first Newsletter for 2012.  ‘Authentic Masculinity’ is an interesting term to use and I would certainly like to see someone define what it is to mean or encompass as the stereotypical male strives towards what must seem like yet another unachievable ideal and societal demand.

    My personal belief is that when you or someone else starts to hang labels on masculinity all we end up with is another vain attempt to prove we really are men or that we are in some way to prove we are masculine enough to be acceptable in ‘the World’, and, probably more importantly for some, by a woman.

    My experience over the last eleven or so years suggests that a quest to find ‘Authentic Masculinity’ will leave anyone on that quest as confused, or more confused, as when the person starts on the journey for masculinity.

    May I suggest that first and foremost, men and any human being for that matter, will benefit greatly from learning to accept oneself unconditionally as he is and where he is at any point in time.  When a person can find enough self-love, in a healthy way not a selfish way, then the quest for this thing labelled as ‘Authentic Masculinity’ may just turn out to be unnecessary.  Perhaps then we can also stop fighting each other and drop the tribal mentality.

  • Ricardo Saldarriaga

    Best wishes Eivind, I always find something inspiring when I read your words. It is bright , warm, sunny and finally dry in my part of our world, I hope you enjoy the winter!

  • Anonymous

    Hi Jon,

    I was discussing this term “authentic” just a few days ago and it is a bit up in the air what it means out there in the public sphere. What would be better ways of describing a more mature form of masculinity in your world? Maybe the word “mature” itself? After all, we need a language to address a more evolved type of masculinity. The word “self-love” becomes too generic for me. “Self-loving masculinity”? That doesn’t work for me. How about you?

    You see, I haven’t experienced the problem you describe in my own life. And I’m leading a group of people through courses on authentic this and that these days and the word doesn’t seem to create the challenges you describe.

    Yet others in my network lately have also suggested that the somewhat abstract notion of authenticity doesn’t serve them on their path. What I see is that self-development too easily becomes the whip we use to punish and shame ourselves with. If I aspire to some standard I don’t even fully understand, will I not suffer from that? Probably.

    But I still believe we need something to aspire to – a map. We can’t just suddenly self-love. Well, hypothetically and in rare cases embraced by grace, but not in the case of the common man. That self-love, I believe, comes from navigating some sort of map for how self-love would look. (I remember Ken Wilber speaks of how cognitive development almost always precedes emotional and psychological.) For how do I know how to love myself when I never have?

    To me, authenticity isn’t some sort of quantifiable “objective standard” – it is a very personal thing and in my case, it is something my body communicates to me. Authenticity for me is a felt sense in the body that normally arises from the way I be or speak with another.

    Do you see authenticity differently?

  • Anonymous

    Thanks, Ricardo! Our winter is mild this year. It’s better than it being freezing cold, but doesn’t really feel like winter. Still, New Years was a beautiful and crisp night.

    Hope you are well!

  • Enric Carbó

    Thanks fir your inspiring work, Eivind. I hope the symposium goes well. Next week I will announce it in my blog. Happy new year

  • EivindFS

    Thanks, Enric :-)

  • Gerardo ramos

    HOLA!!!
    Thanks much for the NY wishes and same to you. Thanks for keeping this site alive!

Tired of being a nice, domesticated man? Time to take a chance in life and offer your gifts to a burning world?

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Then sign up now and join us as we co-create a better world.

I look forward to getting to know you!

Warmly,
Eivind, Masculinity-Movies.com founder

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