«
»

Initiation rites for boys

posted by Eivind on August 31, 2011, at 8:28 pm

Hi Men,

A mother and friend expressed in the comments of my blog post "The terror of young men" pain over a lack of programs, rites and rituals for boys. Many mothers of boys in this world - especially single mums - wish for programs like these. Now, I know these exist, but I haven't taken notes of them and I don't exactly remember the names of the ones I have heard about. I realize now that I have been more focused on men's work than boy's work...

I can spend lots of time doing research and compile a list (I WILL compile a list), but I'd love if you would help me by telling me of programs you know of in the comments below.

Thank you. Such a list could serve many people.

With gratitude,
Eivind

  • Bret Stephenson

    I published a book on this topic: From Boys to Men: Spiritual Rites of Passage in an Indulgent Age. It would help me add to the topic if I knew where you are located. The biggest issue is not so much a lack of programs working initiatory aspects, but what happens afterward when the boy returns to his regular routine and no one else knows or acknowledges what he as been through and keeps treating him as a boy. The best programs are like the International Mankind Project on the West Coast (USA), who after initiating themselves as men realized the need to do the same for boys. Thus, they added Boys to Men where the IMP men mentor long term the typically fatherless boys. Its very important that people understand the process and dynamics in a ROP attempt, which is why I wrote the book. Too many people keep missing the mark because they don’t understand the process or how it all works. When I get an idea of where you are (“mum”) makes me think outside the US.

    Bret Stephenson  MA
    http://www.adolescentmind.com
    http://www.labyrinthcenter.org

  • Bret Stephenson

    OK, here’s a handful to get the ball rolling:

    US
    Vermont area:
    http://www.rope.org/ – The Center for the Advancement of Family and Community Services
    California
    http://www.leapnow.com/ Contact Sam Bull, Director
    http://www.schooloflostborders.com
    http://mankindproject.org/    (for men)
    http://www.boystomen.org/  (for boys)
    http://www.thewildernesswithin.com

    http://riteofpassagejourneys.org/
    Hawaii
    http://www.mauihero.com/index.php?id=1&ss=1&page=home&content=home
    Colorado
    http://www.mensleadershipalliance.org/
    Ohio
    http://www.ritesofpassage.org National Rites of Passage Institute
    Pacific West Coast, Hawaii:
    http://www.pacificquest.org/
    Australia/New Zealand
    http://www.pathwaysfoundation.com.au
    http://www.tracks.net.nz/

  • Jack Kammer

    Great topic, Eivind.

    I agree with Bret. Boys to Men , associated with the New Warriors/Mankind Project, does a nice job with initiation ritual weekends.

  • Anonymous

    Here’s one: Young men’s ultimate weekend
    http://www.ymuw.org/

    Thanks for all contributions so far.

    Eivind

  • Anonymous

    Here’s one: Young men’s ultimate weekend
    http://www.ymuw.org/

    Thanks for all contributions so far.

    Eivind

  • Rick Belden

    Very glad to see Bret contributing to this discussion. I’ve read his book, really enjoyed it, and he is a great source of information on this topic, as is Jack.

    A couple of other resources that may be useful:

    * Boys to Men of Maine (USA): http://www.maineboystomen.org (does not appear to be affiliated with the national organization cited by Bret and Jack)

    * A documentary film called “Journeyman”: http://www.mirrormanfilms.org/film.html (site includes overview and clips from film)

    I’m sure there’s more out there and I’m hoping others will heed Eivind’s call and chime in.

  • Anonymous

    I haven’t forgotten this list. I have just been too busy to follow it. I will tell my friend about all these great resources and hopefully summarize them in some sort of document.

    Thanks for contributing, men!

  • Rigel White

    Wow…Thank you all so much for this wonderful information.  Bret…I will be picking up your book right away.  I was telling Eivind that our son was is a terrible wreck with our truck last week…and it really scared us all pretty bad….sense then we have really clamped down on him.  We are beginning to see results finally and a certain relaxation in him that was not present before and were attributing that to the discipline.  Previously we believed that freedom should inherently be a young mans right….he slowly threw that away…putting his life at risk…and the lives of others.  There is a certain strength that comes from Freedom that is earned however and that seems to be creating a rock solid foundation…where he can draw upon this strength and articulate better…because his consciousness has broken through the chaos somehow.  As a woman, mother, & wife it is hard for me to describe…& I really dont understand it…but I do feel that We are on the path to understanding.  Again….thank you all so much for your commitment to life.     

  • Eivind F S

    After I checked your website, Bret, I realize I have seen your book “From boys to men” in a local bookstore and been interested by it. Now that you have posted on this site, it’s only a matter of time before I read it. When I do, I’ll write about it on my blog.

    Thanks for your contribution and your work.

  • Earl

    Check out my book Man-Making – Men Helping Boys on Their Journey to Manhood. It discusses a variety of ways good men can show up for boys, and profiles many programs in which men are supporting the young males in their communities. You can order the book from the Man-Making website: http://man-making.com/ or from the Man-Making Blog site: http://journeytomanhood.blogspot.com/. You can also get it at Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/097413242X/humanresourcedev

  • http://www.socialmediarealized.com Craig Filek

    I love this thread! Thank you so much for compiling this list!!

    Here are my contributions:
    http://www.WhereThereBeDragons.com
    http://www.JaysonGaddis.com
    http://www.mirrormanfilms.org/
    and here’s a post I wrote: http://enlightenedchild.blogspot.com/2009/08/just-catching-my-breath.html

  • Anonymous

    Thanks for sharing, Earl! :-)