Masculinity-Movies blog

Are you brave enough to face your demons?

posted by Eivind on July 10, 2014, at 2:14 pm

When I left Boulder, Colorado in April, I left behind an amazing intimate relationship, a great community, the experience of giving my gifts beyond my comfort zone and more validation from beautiful women than I had ever experienced.

I was afraid that returning home would trap me in the gravitational pull of my own culture and wipe out any developments I had made on my life journey in my stateside adventure.

For many months, I was doing well, but for the past several weeks, it is as if my consciousness is on a downhill trajectory. Combined with intense feelings of melancholy and emotional pain, I’ve been questioning if I’m in the right place. And I’ve been shaken to my core. Feeling afraid and like a young boy.

These are the times in our lives when it’s easy to start thinking that it’s possible to devolve, to somehow slide back down the mountain. These are the times that it’s easy to think that something is wrong, that God and the Universe are untrustable and that on some level I’m screwed.

Forgetting your Soul

Well, I’m going to die. That is clear. I might even experience lots of pain along the way. So in that sense, yes I’m screwed.

And yet for the person standing at the gates of initiation, facing the demons that protect the realms of our next incarnation from our entry, that is good news. For it gives us the necessary impetus to take the situation seriously and find the courage to see what is really going on. That is the only way that we will find our way across that burning threshold.

See, the only way a human Soul can “devolve” is to be forgotten, to become a stranger to itself by falling into the river Lethe (Greek mythological river of oblivion). In other words, to never move across that threshold.

Our consumerist culture has mastered that act of forgetting. The trance of instant gratification has committed genocide against the souls of the global population. For when this side of the burning threshold can be made pleasant by a thousand things, why would you want to cross and burn your very identity to ash?

Every human will in the course of their lives feel called to adventure. Every human will at some point feel the yearning to engage in the dance of life from a deeper inner truth than we have heretofore been privy to. But when people arrive at the place where I’m at right now, most seek refuge in addictions (like I still sometimes do).

It seems quite clear, however, that you cannot be taken by the siren song of consumerism and at the same time live a soulful life of meaning. It is impossible. So most people choose to forget. Most people choose to drown themselves in the river of oblivion, or as Henry David Thoreau put it:

The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.

Facing the demons within

Painful experiences like the one I’m going through are not wrong, they are not obstacles. On the contrary, they are the requisite fuel for the fires of transformation that will purge our old identity structures so that a truer and more soulful form of us can be birthed into this world.

And when this process of transformation happens to us, it can seem like we have been singled out for pain. That in our suffering, we are somehow special. I have felt that a lot lately. Yet, on closer examination, it seems that we are at the effect of a universal law: Whenever we commit ourselves, consciously or unconsciously, to living out our great work in the world, the demons that would prevent us from doing so will suddenly all come alive in our inner worlds. It has been designed that way. It is a gift to us. Only this way can we face our fears and find our peace with them.

In other words, committing to carrying out your great work in the world is not going to be an always-happy experience. Your identity will peel off layer by layer and you will be afraid. But at the same time, it’s going to carry a meaning of significance and soul-alignment that outweighs any frights that may appear along the way. And it is going to initiate you into a courage that average men will never know.

The price of being in true service

When I came back to Norway, I had big visions of transforming Norwegian sociey. And instead, Norway is kicking my ass. Similarly, as I’m entering the creative process of creating an archetypal immersion course based on my knowledge of the KWML archetypes, I question whether I’m worthy of giving that to you.

Such a situation could stop many people from moving ahead. It could stop me from moving ahead (it won’t). We would let that happen ignorant of how perfectly this has all been designed in support of our deepest gifts. We can not give our gifts from a place of arrogance, from a place of thinking we have all the answers. We must be humbled and awed to live our purpose fully.

So instead of fighting this process through addictions, depressions or emotional drama, we can choose to be with the pain, and allow it to bring us into the underworld, there to be reborn as true adults. And in the process, you may find, as have I, that support will magically arrive at your doorstep. This too is a gift to you. To let you know that even though you are going through hard times and may tell yourself terrible things, you are loved exactly as you are.

Authentic living is not an always-happy experience. God isn’t giving us brownie points for being with what’s so. And that doesn’t mean it’s anything but exactly right, exactly perfect.

To give our gifts and serve as guardians of this world, we are inevitably going to face terrible things. It’s unavoidable. And that’s why most don’t do it. They would rather be “quietly desperate” than terrified yet full of life and purpose on the frothy edges of the evolutionary process.

My vision with the “Reclaim your inner throne: An archetypal immersion experience”-course is to initiate you into these landscapes. I want to show you these thresholds and help you cross. So isn’t it more than a little obvious that I should be going through exactly that experience as I create the course for you? It’s going to be one hell of a ride. It’s for the brave amongst you. Cowards don’t do well with truth and initiation.

If you want to be one of the 10 men that get to go through the beta release of this course, as a band of brothers mapping out the territory where others will follow, facing your demons and giving your gifts, then contact me and let me know (several places have already been taken).

Blessings on your path, Brother.

In Service,
Eivind

Heeding the call of Soul

posted by Eivind on July 4, 2014, at 2:12 pm

I’m currently reading Soulcraft, a beautiful book by depth psychologist and wilderness guide Bill Plotkin. In doing so I’m reminded of the different realms of existence within which we get to journey and evolve: Spirit, Ego and Soul. Or the Overworld, Middleworld and Underworld.

(Please read to the end of this post – I have an exciting offer that may be a great match for you)

Understanding the territory of the upper worlds

In our Western culture, we prioritize Ego and Spirit. We prioritize psychological function and communing with God.

michelangelo-gods-handWhen Plotkin speaks of the middle world, he speaks of a deeply human place, where the Ego-driven human being is sovereign. That does not make this world a necessarily terrible place, unlike many would have us believe (only immature egos give rise to terrible sufferings).

Ego is that psychological operating system that gives us a feeling of identity and the resources to function in the profane world. When we receive psychotherapy or coaching, we work in the domain of Ego. We work on healing our fractured selves so that our function in the world is optimized. We learn about empathy and to trust in ourselves. We learn about boundaries. In other words, the Ego we speak of here is not the domain of evil, as it is frequently seen in the religions of the world. It is rather a necessary function of the deeply human part of ourselves, like it is in the KWML archetypal work of Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette that I’m well known for.

When we pray, meditate or engage with other kinds of spiritual practices, we seek to inhabit the domain of Spirit. We seek the blissful re-alignment with the Sacred, which was always there, but was lost on the way. We find the Oneness of all phenomena and disappear in light. This is a beautiful thing, but the inherent risk is that we become light chasers, or what Robert Augustus Masters call spiritual bypassers. This can be recognized in people that speak of lofty spiritual ideals and who seem to have a certain glow and lightness, but who cannot function in the world and are secretly judgmental and emotionally repressed.

Michelangelo’s famous painting in the Sistine Chapel shows the yearning these two worlds have for each other. Spirit wants to incarnate in human form and Man yearns to return to his divine Source.

Setting up camp in the Underworld

If you know my work, you may recognize that neither of these domains are where I’ve set up basecamp, for better or worse.

After being in the domain of chasing light for most of my twenties, my 30s have initiated me into the dark, numinous caverns of the Underworld. And there, I re-encountered a world I first discovered when I was about 10 years old, when a small Greek woman named Aleka walked into my classroom for the first time.

She was a temporary teacher and would tell stories from Greek mythology (which unlike Christianity embraces the Underworld) when we had been good and worked hard. I fell in love with that universe. I consumed books on the subject and drew depictions of Greek goddesses, who represented a beauty for which I longed (my favorite subject is depicted to the right).

An integral part of the path of Soul is to become more familiar with the essential gifts we have been entrusted with in this lifetime. And early childhood experiences often have stories to tell us were we but to listen to them. I was more fascinated by fairy tales and mythology than superheroes when I was young. Had I understood the significance of this sooner, I may not have chosen the ascendent path for so long.

In traditional Christianity, the realm of Soul is not an inviting place – unless you like the thought of ending up in Hell. Soul is that part of reality that has seemed out of control, hostile even; Nature and the Anima (the feminine in us) are viewed with suspicion.

No wonder Soul is not present in Michelangelo’s painting. Also no wonder the Christian world has had so few qualms about destroying Nature and the indigenous people who live in communion with it.

So Western culture doesn’t have an easy-going relationship with Soul. Neither does the Eastern, whose religions also generally deny Soul, although the Daoists fare better.

The underworld is one which seems to have been widely repressed. It is the domain of paganism, indigenous cultures, ancestral lineages, death and rebirth in rites of passage. It is that dark place where demons feast on our flesh and strip us to the bone so that we can resurrect free of the baggage of the past and possibly with mystical powers. It is the realm of alchemy.

This world has gone underground and survived in hiding in myths and fairy tales – even movies (in fact, Disney is one of the main proponents of Soul in our culture today, which is more than a little disconcerting). And yet it still speaks to us from below. “Hear me! Don’t forget me! Ignore me at your own risk!”

I live in that domain these days. It’s a heavy and dark place, and also incredibly fertile. It’s nature-bound and has a sombre beauty about it. And it should break your heart.

Foremost among my sources of inspiration on this path is currently the English poet David Whyte.

I feel incredibly nourished by David Whyte’s poetry. And it has brought me inspiration for my own, which I intend to share with you to soon.

Your Inner Throne (an invitation)

I’m very excited now as I tell you that I’ve finally started real work on my KWML archetype product, “Reclaiming your Inner Throne: An archetypal immersion experience”. Archetypes live in the Underworld, in the collective unconscious. And in understanding the Soul-walker’s path better, I’ve had powerful insights that lead me to having breakthroughs in this manifestation process.

If the path of ascension is too narrow for you and the thought of success alone is too impoverished for you, then maybe you are the perfect person to walk this path with me. It will be a product that initiates you into a deeper knowing of yourself. It will beckon you closer to your big work in this life. It will help you to have trust in the inherent abundance of the universe (which I too need help with).

And if my deep period of research and exploration of this subject is as fruitful as I hope, going on this journey may have far-reaching consequences for something else that I know you care about (I’m deliberately being obscure for now). We won’t turn our backs on the Middleworld and Overworld, however – they will all be present.

I have no clear idea of when this product will be done. It will probably be a creative process of many months. I’m going to the woods in August on a creative retreat, after which I will know more.

I want to offer you something that I’m excited about before the release of it, however. I’m deliberately reaching out support in my life. And I would love to have you on my side as I create this product for you. I have therefore decided to release this product to a small group of 10 people initially.

If you are one of these 10 people, you will get the product at a fraction of the price I will release it at (I’m aiming for $79 vs the likely $299 for final product). And you will be part of a very exclusive group of people who get to go on a very intimate journey together, even co-creating parts of the experience with me.

This rich experience has life-changing potential and if you feel drawn to being part of this initial group of trailblazers, give me a hint below or send me an e-mail (before I start communicating this offer more broadly).

May you have a Soulful weekend. May the Otherworld shine through to yours and communicate to you the signs that you seek.

Talk soon,
Eivind

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Masculinity-Movies Facebook quotes

posted by Eivind on June 19, 2014, at 8:44 pm

Hello friends,

I’ve been negligent with this site and this community lately. I’m sorry, but I’m planning something bigger that you will hear about soon and the smaller stuff has been falling by the wayside.

In order to keep more in touch with my community – you guys and gals – I’ve decided to start creating Facebook posters of inspiring quotes from movies I’ve reviewed. It’s a way to say “hi, I’m still here” while hopefully also inspiring you. If some of them go viral, I won’t mind Smilefjes som blunker

I’m experiencing a deepening connection to nature lately. I recently went into the woods and felt my heart explode to the point of me almost vanishing. And then I started weeping. For a LONG time. A constant stream of tears of gratitude. I sat on a wood stump overlooking the green early summer fields of the place I was born, and the vibrant, lush beauty overwhelmed me.

As I sat there, I felt a huge commitment to this planet stir in the depths of my soul. The tears took on a different texture – tears of despair, of sacred anger and disbelief “what the FUCK are we doing to this planet?”. A sort of neo-tribal sacred warriorship is growing in me as I feel into this agonizing inquiry.

So I’ve decided to make this first poster about our planet and it’s accompanied by a quote from Avatar, reviewed here on the site by Marten Sims.

This first one is the first and last to be published on the site. The remaining ones will be published on the Masculinity-Movies Facebook page.

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Emotion, Presence…and a container of Pez

posted by Eivind on May 12, 2014, at 10:41 am

The other day, my buddy Garrison Cohen launched this video on Elephant Journal. It’s on the path of healing through closing open feeling loops, one Pez at a time Smilefjes som blunker

I enjoyed this video. I find the metaphor really works. And it got me thinking about emotion and Presence.

The awe-inspiring wisdom of emotion

It appears, were Garrison to be correct, that the Human OS requires every emotional program to run through to its conclusion before it can close down; before the Pez can be eaten. Most modern men live lives that are way too scattered for that to happen. Closing an open feeling loop requires Presence. Presence is prerequisite for actually feeling emotion. Unless we bring Presence to the open emotional loops, we will be stuck with them for the rest of our lives.

I find this absolutely awe-inspiring. The fact that we come fully equipped with this amazing inner signal system called emotion makes my mind boggle with amazement. How does this signal system work? Painful emotions are signposts. They are the human being’s built-in truth-meter. The further away I am from the truth of my being, the more painful emotions I will have. In other words, if you are depressed, it’s simply because you believe, on some level of your being, in something that is not real.

This has made intuitive sense to me for a long time, and I was beautifully reminded of it recently by the young Boulder-based non-dual teacher Bentinho Massaro.

So try on that painful emotions are but a collection of signposts pointing our way back home.

Emotional repression

The reason this blows my mind is that the Creator didn’t have to design us that way. We could have been designed without the capacity to experience emotional pain. In a different universe, we could have been designed to effortlessly move on with our lives after traumatic events, free of the reign of aftershocks in our inner emotional landscape.

Wouldn’t that make things easier? Yes, for traditional man, I believe, that would be paradise. Imagine moving through life and not being impacted by anything! Imagine the superhuman strength! The unshakable confidence! Yee-eeeees!

The thing is, traditional man is a feeling human being like any other. And while the stoics of the world, Vladimir Putin being a perfect example, seem convinced otherwise, they are wrong. Men who repress their emotions remain with myriad open feeling loops. Their Pez container remains full of crap. The effects of which is basically that they completely lose themselves and become slaves of their unprocessed trauma.

Vladimir Putin and his likes, rather than being examples of strength, are thus examples of the terrible effects of a life designed to keep emotion at bay. They become fugitives in their own lives, entering severe addictions or, in the worst case scenarios, dish out pain on the world in order to remain in un-feeling.

Indeed, if you were to go looking for the source of misery in our human drama and ecological collapse, you need look no further than repressed emotion.

Fully felt emotion and the power of Presence

So we didn’t have to be designed this way. But if we weren’t, everyone would be like Vladimir Putin. That’s not a pretty picture, especially not when it is conjured by a feeling person.

You being in touch with painful emotion is good news. It’s a step up from repression. It is a condition that actually gives you a fighting chance to discover a good life for yourself, and to become a person who lives a life of service. Your inner signal system is working! Congratulations!

And yet, we are trained to repress emotion. The proof is that the painful emotions we feel often arrive as a crap-sandwich, emotion lodged between shame and resentment. When we resist emotion like this, the compulsory experience of pain turns, like the Buddha hinted at, into the optional experience of suffering.

consumerismSadly, the survival of our culture as we know it depends on us remaining slaves of our own unfelt emotion. Unfelt emotion is the very lifeblood of consumerism! “You can never get enough of what you don’t really want” said Huston Smith. Consumerism will never satiate us. Because what we really hunger for is the freedom that lies on the other side of feeling emotions fully.

As I walked home from the office the same day Garrison released his video, thoughts like these on my mind, I took the emotional road less travelled. With fierce Presence from hosting an incredibly powerful and mystical Circling night in my home the evening before, I had the moment to moment capacity, as I was walking down the street, to be with every little sensation and emotion inside of me.

I have experienced emotional turmoil after returning to Norway, and I also have mild chronic fatigue and a lot of tensions in my body. A lot of the time, that pisses me off.

But this day, I noticed, as I brought Presence to it, that it kept shifting, moving. It was never static. I was taken on a ride of my own inner emotional-sensory landscape. And it was very pleasurable, very alive, in its infinite unpredictability.

Listen up now, because here’s the one universal truth that I’d like you to walk away with today: Emotional trauma only enters us when Presence leaves us. And when powerful Presence fills a part of our being, trauma can not remain there for long. We get to pop the Pez.

When you start understanding this, it’s like taking the red pill. You will see the people whose lives are governed by emotional repression and recognize that they’re living in a desolate dream-world. They really are stuck in the Matrix.

When emotional repression numbs us to the potent beauty of our innermost essence, we are run by the unconscious forces of the world. We become ignorant consumers who believe that we are deficient, and that the only way to remedy our inherent deficiency is to buy some crap.

For some twisted reason, a lot of ideals of manhood will tell you to become such a slave. Choose a different path.

With love and a fierce challenge,
Eivind

PS! I will gladly help you with this process. For me, this is about embracing our Wildness. Check out my coaching offers.

Introducing the Lover archetype

posted by Eivind on May 1, 2014, at 6:35 am

Finally, after years of waiting, here’s the video for the Lover archetype. I hope you enjoy it!

Please leave your comments below. Thanks!